Lent!:D

Boo you.
Thought I'd share for lent since I have time on my hands. -my homework not printing and all-. But anyway, just wanted to share how Lent's been good for me. I've never been the best at sacrificing things for spiritual preps and all. But this Lent seems different somehow. I admit, I'm still fighting with myself for certain things, but as I shared with someone the other day, I believe that trying is at least better than not trying at all. One of my school's old econs teachers came back to give us a talk sometime at the end of the last year. And I thought what he shared was pretty interesting, so I'll give you a brief(: :

His company wanted to raise funds for charity like they normally do every year. The question was, "How much to set as their target?". In a stroke of sheer insanity or clarity, he declared that they should raise a million. Everyone thought he was crazy, and just kept telling him that he'd never reach it so he shouldn't bother anyway, but that didn't stop him from insisting that they try. When their charity event was over, they didn't reach a million like they'd hoped. They didn't even reach half that. They did however raise more than a quarter of a million at 275,000 dollars. A good ten times more than their original more down-to-earth target of 25,000 dollars that the rest of his company had initially proposed of aiming for.

I guess I don't know how much you will take away from it, but my point is this: Sometimes we give ourselves easy goals for sacrifices in Lent, because we know that they are more achievable. More than that, we don't want to disappoint ourselves and we don't want to potentially disappoint God for not being able to hit that mark that we verbally tell him we will hit. But God is like any loving father. He wants us to live and to love to our fullest potential. If we give him a cup that is only so big, then God can only fill our cup to its fullest for that size. Though God wants to give us so much more, it is not God who is stopping the flow of his unending love, we as humans merely have put forth nothing to catch it with.

In a similar way, I've found Lent over the past few days to be extremely fulfilling. My sacrifice of refraining from sweet drinks in school is doing well, and I've been pushing the boundaries to get myself to stop drinking sweet drinks outside of school as well. Not always the easiest process, but I like being able to constantly set higher standards. I'm not great with going cold turkey for several things at once sometimes, so I've taken to taking an additive approach. As long as I progressively push the boundaries of my sacrifice, and add more sacrifices where I see fit, I think God will be happy to see that I'm trying. Not much, but it's a start. And beyond that, I think I realise that it's not where you start, but where you go and where you work to end up. So if anyone feels like it, you can join me in continually adding to your Lenten sacrifices. (: as of now, I have about 6 going. And encounting. Seeing as I add them whenever I see that it's something I need to change. So yes, join me(:! God always appreciates your efforts at getting closer to him(:

Hope life's been treating you all well. Most of all, I hope that you can see where God is working in it.
God Bless, swee(:

Sharings

I really don't know where to start. I feel like i'm recounting a life story! (WAH SIAN!) but please. try to read to the end! BTW i don't blog so i don't know how to change my name from owl, but i'm TimChan.

I guess i really have to thank Samuel for persuading me to come to bible sharing. i mean its been a very very long while and i was feeling so lazy. Such an awesome prayer buddy! :P I still have ALOT of people to thank, but I will leave them till the end.

I have to thank Candice, Gerard, Terence, Pearlyn and Ch'ng for the amazing retreat. I know this retreat wasn't like the others, i definitely did not come out spiritually high, but i came out of those 2 days much more different. i emerged with a more reflective mood and just realized so much about myself that i didn't know or just forgot underneath all the facades that i wear/carry (i don't know the right word) I emerged more certain of where is it I see GOD. But I still feared losing all this.

I realized as much as i do see GOD in people, like Swee, Jordan, Gerard, etc. I do see him too in empty space, peaceful and quiet in my heart. But, I fail to see him in OWL's sharings, agm, etc. Until tonight, you know how everybody says GOD has a plan? I think tonight i really believe that truly. Sharing started off quite off, as in, people were talking joking even as Gerard read the gospel and began reflecting. But some how as everybody shared, i realized that this sharing was GOD speaking through us, this sharing where everybody lets out their feelings towards community was much better than agm or the retreat, and its these sharings we should have all the time. I belive that GOD called every OWL member to today by name, and i'm only sad so many could not come.

So today's sharing was supposed to be about closing the year by looking at the blessings that GOD has showered upon everyone of us. I actually came up with a list. But it was too short, should have been longer. The list is as follow :
- OWL
- friends
- my overseas trips in my entires life
- family
- friends
I know i repeated friends. In my mind, friends are the greatest blessing i have.

BUT, today's sharing ended up about community, like continued session from agm. I guess the gospel did strike me in this. "And Mary kept all these things, reflecting on them in her heart." This strikes me as I realize how much I keep doing that. As in, i have a lot of stuff I normally wish to say. but i think i'm afraid. i'm afraid of being judge some how. and that i sometimes think people won't understand me.

And today, i said things which i guess came out wrongly. i know i sounded quite despondent at OWL's current state. but no. i'm not. I LOVE OWL & EVERYONE IN IT! Which is why i still come back every week even though my parents have asked me before to just go IHM as it is much easier. (my whole family goes there. NO it is not IMH) I belive OWL is not cui, as in it is not perfect, but it is definitely not cui. I just find that sometimes we do things all at the wrong time. i mean yes, it is great to have fun, but not when its time to be reflective. And i agree with JP here, there is a time and a place for everything. (this was said during the sharing earlier, for those who didn't go)

When Vic shared about community and how the community is all willing to be there for one another, but is not willing to be vulnerable to one another, it just kinda resonated so truly in me. For this, i gotta thank Corinne and Ch'ng. Their spiritual prep about reconcilling with community members, i actually realized how much I just hide a huge part of myself from OWL, from the closest people in my life. But yet i was so willing to be there to listen to their problems. I thought then that i wasn't being a good person, not being fair to them. (for a lack of a better word) But Swee helped me to realize that in the end, the person i hurt most would be myself.

So i guess that was the main sharing, now for the credits:
- I have to first and foremost thank Jerome Ong, Bryan Seah, Pearlyn, Sherman, Terence, Ch'ng, Gerard, Samuel, Ivan, JP, Iris, Candice, Vic and Jordan for coming yesterday for sharing and affirm you guys for really sharing how you all feel, i know there might be some differences in opinions in some of the sharings, but i feel that the way everything was handled is how we as a community should handle. and this sharing is really what i hope the entire OWL can achieve.
- Next, I have thank Amanda Swee Ping En, the effort she put into outreaching to every single member of OWL and also in bravely sharing her opinions which really made an impact in everybody. I would like to ask everybody to pray for her too, i think she is quite stressed.
- I also have to thank Jordan Steve. When the Core was busy with 'A's, it was amazing to see how he just takes on all the roles he can help and does a lot of work which is truly amazing. And also how he just becomes an amazing support to people in OWL. Pray for him while he is in a spiritually dry period and may he find GOD
- I thank Sherman Lim for being there throughout the whole period of OWL's need. Going to Bible Sharings every week (and if you are reading this sherman, i ask you not to constantly store feelings and emotions up in you. share them with others.) and constantly just taking whatever nonsense we throw at him, (like smacking his butt, or using his facebook to comment statuses which are not true) which we really should not actually.
- I thank Candice, Ronald, Samuel, Ivan, Gerard, Ch'ng, Joshua Teo for playing for spiritual preps in the retreat.

I have many more things i want to thank many more people, but i really am writing too long a post. so i bid you farewell and just ONE last thing. This year was a challenging one for OWL, but i belive it's through these challenges that we can grow as ONE WITH THE LORD and to achieve all our vision for OWL. I hope that we may make use of this challenging year to learn and to grow stronger.

PRAISE GOD!

My Reflections of the Year - Jordan

I guess upon reflecting on this year, i realised that i should have done soooooo much more than what i actually did. and i feel quite disturbed by it i guess cause i should have outreached to others, but then i didn't, so then i am kinda responsible for their lose in faith?

i realised how a neglected those who didn't bother to come for session and sharing, which i guess should be a part of being a community, to support them in their time of need, but i didn't so i wasn't community to others

i mean i did grow in my own faith journey, but i guess i didn't put in much effort and emphasis in the community aspect of my life.

Also, i think what really struck me was shared during the OWL recollection and AGM. Swee said that we should include God and remember Him in everything, even the smallest of happenings. I mean i guess i was facing a spiritual crisis recently, i was very very dry and just could not see or feel God, but deep down inside i knew He loves me, but I honestly could not feel this love. That is probably why i wanted sessions based on love. I guess all in all, as in one of Fr Bosco's homilies: Love is not just a emotion, but it is an action.

I guess I was really upset that I was losing my faith. And then i think the reason i stopped seeing God was because I stopped making the effort to seek God in everything, Also, my life had become a routine. Even going for mass was affected.

I think i went for mass and DO many times, but i stopped seeing the meaning in it. I know it is to praise and worship God, but it didn't feel like i was praising God, more like i was there because it was routine.

Also, i think i could have taken more effort to journey with my cell group and my prayer buddy. I guess i left out these two important parts of community and i think i really neglected this areas. I really want to say sorry to all who i have neglected.

Well, this is a new beginning and I guess this would be my resolution for the new year.

Firstly, I think that i need to put in more effort in improving my relationships in Owl, starting with my Prayer buddy and then growing outwards to my cell and then the entire community. Wait, change that, I WILL put in more effort!

I know spending more time journeying with Matthew, my p.b. will be extremely difficult, supposing he gets posted earlier into NS and i end up in boarding school(hostel), which may be compulsory. But i really think that i really need to make more time and build this relationship with Matthew.

And for my cell group, i guess I should try my utmost best to make time and initiate activities and gatherings! I really want to affirm Swee for making the effort to talk to everyone and initiate many things!! I really appreciated the effort she put in and it inspires me!

Secondly, when things within Owl are stabilised and we are all strong in the faith, i would like to outreach to those (who were) in Owl or even those in the Parish who might feel left out because of awkwardness or fear. I think it is part of what i envisioned Owl to be, whereby everyone feels that we are part of this ONE community so as to be ONE WITH THE LORD!

Lastly, and i believe, most importantly, I need God is in everything that I do. I will make sure that in everything, I will include God and remember that we are NOW AND ALWAYS in HIS MOST HOLY PRESENCE!

God Bless

-Jordan

Confirmation Retreat

I think this retreat is one of my GREATEST experiences so far in my relationship with God!! There were so many high points in this short 2day2night retreat! It was my first time being a facil for such an important camp so I was absolutely nervous and scared.

Before the retreat, it was a really testing time for me. I had just received my exam results and I did really badly. Well, things weren't really working out for me. I was quite distraught and was not looking forward to the retreat. However, there was something calling me to put in my all for the retreat. And when Spiritual Prep came, it completely lighten my heavy heart and enlightened me. Confession was also a very joyous experience, one of my better ones.

I think what really helped me was fasting before the camp. I wanted to completely surrender to God for once. So instead of fasting for the 2 days, I decided it would be better to fast for the week. There were so many temptations to break fast, but I really put in my all in all and pulled through. The spiritual prep by Stephen before the camp started was excellent, and I think that really helped me to get into the right frame of mind! Praise God!

The one event that completely healed me, was definitely Nicholas Tan's opening worship. It was really great and I truly affirm him for that! I feel that that was the turning point of the retreat for me. I was really excited from that moment on and God was from that moment, ever so real to me. That was why I was upset that the Confirmands were not yet in the right frame of mind to receive from that powerful worship. It almost put me to tears. God really strengthened me.

Though all that time, I had completely forgotten that we had the skit during Greg and Jessica's session. I felt quite unprepared, so I just let God do the work, and it turned out great!! I was given a wonderful and really open group and 2 amazing co-facils, Alexandra and Aloysius, so I didn't need to struggle or fear at all. Sharing was wonderful. However, I was very disheartened during the mime practice as I had completely forgotten everything and nothing was going well for me though. So I had a rough night.

The next morning, I needed to start out my day with God. So I prepared myself and flew to the Adoration room. I was desperate for God, and I just said to him, "Please just help me today, I need you. Take control." I needed strength again. And God did just that, he took control of me and guided me the whole day.

Cheryl asked us to intercede during the recon while ushering the Confirmands and I experience the hug of God during the whole time. Indeed, God was truly present the whole time. Then we had a truly Spirit filled spiritual prep for the Outpouring of the Holy Spirit!! It was really really draining, and I wasn't the only one who felt drained. I was completely overwhelmed by the amount of power present in the Parish Hall. The atmosphere and setting of the room was completely transformed with the power and might of God! Mark saw Angels and today, I can affirm it, as God really sent down the heavens and he worked wonders during the night. How I wish I was a confirmand this retreat.

Well, during the night, I lead the facils in the Rosary, which I must say, I did not realise that I prayed so loudly. When my group shared about the Hail Mary overpowering the Mic in volume, I was so shocked and so scared that I was distracting them. OH NO!!! I was really scared, right until JP shared that someone in his group started crying during the Ave Maria, then I could finally heave a sigh of relief. haha

Overall the 2 days were really joyous experiences. I went straight to bathe after debrief, but then suddenly remember that there was supposed to be mime practice whilest under the shower..... Praise God it was delayed. On the last day, I really saw the confirmands who were transformed and empowered by the holy spirit!! And I felt that the mime went better than I could ever imagine. I did not even need to preempt what my next move was, it just came to me. That I would say, was definitely God working in me. Praise GOD!!!!

I think Maryanne's testimony really spoke to me especially because I have had that exact experience and life, so I knew that I was not alone in my journey in Christ. So THANKS BE TO GOD FOR HER!!! And she also affirmed me for alot of which happened during the camp. I think she really made my day!



Thanks for reminding me James! I almost forgot to add in!! My God experience this retreat is definitely better than my own retreat last year! So PRAISE GOD FOR THAT!!! I guess it's because I put in more effort to surrender to God this year and I was more open!

Wish you all were there to experience God too!!

Lots of Love,

Jordan

BIBLE SHARING IMPORTANT NEWS

Brothers and Sisters in Christ.


Today, it was a very embarrassing experience for OWL in Bible Sharing.
Firstly, there were only three of us.
Secondly, there was no one who planned bible sharing.
Lastly, WE were supposed to be the ones in charge of Bible Sharing today.


Thank goodness Louisa helped us take charge of bible sharing and save our ass.


I think it was a very irresponsible act. I think that we need to be informed of when we are in charge of bible sharing. It was a really awkward and horrible situation to be in. Neither of the three of us knew nor were we informed that we were in charge of the planning.


It is the basic responsibility for everyone to keep informed of dates and times of events.
Everybody, please play your part in helping the community.


Perhaps you may blame the three of us for not planning to lead impromptu, and perhaps we may be wrong, but at least we came.


P.S. We are doing Bible Sharing or Adoration for BASIC when it is they are roster-ed to lead.

Bible Sharing

Hey guys! Please try and come down for bible sharing tomorrow!! I don't wanna have another htht with JP again!! HAHA no offense JP!!! God Bless! JORDAN

Seeing that people try, even when unpublished, makes my heart warmer. just that much more. thank you sherman and jp, you guys make my day.

Hi guys. You know what? Everybody needs a boost every now and then. So I hope that you remember that when you read this today that God is deeply in love with you. He knows you hurt, he knows your pain. And he has known it from the inside out. God wants to love you in the way that you will take it best. But that too is so dependent on how much you want to open yourself up to him. Opening up to God isn't easy and most people find it tough. But be assured that God knows to hold your hand and catch you when you fall. He knows you best even when you think the world knows you not at all. God loves you a lot. And today he wants to know that Jesus loves you too. He loves you, they love you, we all love you. And for no matter what you are going through today, there is an honest and great love around you. Close your eyes, open your heart, and let it seep right through. Today dear friend, know, love and realise. God loves you.

swee.

have a good day today. yeah?(:

god bless. always.